Practices of old age are really not so different ... We cook the same but not as much. We exercise but not as much. We spend about as much time naked as younger folk. And we have the same problem fumbling for and making fine language distinctions.
Pairs like Guilt and Shame. All of us would like to keep them separated in our minds even if the boundary between them gets fuzzy. That's it: "fuzziness." Envy and Jealousy are like that, too. We're envious when another person who we can't come to love has characteristics that we'd like to have. (I like to split between toxic and beneficent envy ... but that's for another posting.) Jealousy is what we feel when, for instance, another person is the recipient of certain sentiments from a third person that we'd like receive from them, instead. And, hey, Love and Marriage may go together, as the song says, like a Horse and Carriage ... but, still and as the song recognizes, they're not identical. Aye. Distinction is all!
(I must be straining to get to what I want to say for some reasons ... y'think? ... get on with it, H)
So, this AM, both M and I arose with disquieting dreams. Mine were forgotten but M reported that in her dreams I had been indulging synchronized horizontal aerobics with a young woman and that she was left out and behind selling some wares in a Mart or something. Being a Last Quarter Player, I was honored to think that M'Lady could still have fantasies about me being the lustful object of someone less than half my age. Pretty cool. The fact that the good time I was having was in her dream didn't totally escape me. Some people have a hard time separating the dreamworld where their lover is cheating and reality. M has a good hold on reality and I do, too -- not to say I didn't enjoy being cast in her fiction.
Any case, M and I went on with our activities. I had something to do in my office and then we had some liturgical duties that had a religious flavor and .. then ... we came home. We ate some corn ... noting, sadly, that Summer is ending. Then the dream came up, again. (Me'thinks the man protesteth ... overly ... what's his beef?)
H: So, about the Dream? Was I having a really good time?
M: Well, yes. What about it.
H: Well, next time, you could do me a favor ...
M: What's that? 'Keep it to myself."
H: No ... No ... No.
M: Well, then what?
H: Maybe you could take better notes.
Old couple? Still talking and smiling together about 49 years watching each other age ... hopefully with bits of humor. "Tears and Laughter" ... LIfe can be good.
No comments:
Post a Comment