Mass Murderer

I talk a great deal about balancing Sadness and Glee ... juggling these feelings, together. But there are lots of human experiences that require such balance. I think of a few that come quickly to mind:

Self Love vs. Love of Others

Others' Perception of Us vs. Our Own Sense of Ourselves

Humility vs. Self-Esteem.

many others.

This weekend was full of a great deal. My oldest grandchild is going off to school ... Sadness and Glee for a whole bunch of more or less obvious reasons. We had a party ... parties are good. Years ago, people on both sides of her family would show up, especially for Birthdays and Holidays. She was the first grandchild for all the four grandparents and the first niece for uncles and aunts, alike. We called ourselves her "entourage" and would arise like devoted fans regaling a rock star or like Pilgrims bringing presents to our Princess or god. And she was/is a pretty cool kid. A blessing!

The weekend was, in addition, full of discussions (that's a nicey-nice word for knock-down-verbal brawls) about the World's situations ... well, frankly, its Wars and Killing Fields. The cyberworld and the dinner tables both were easily caught up, particularly, about the Israeli incursion into Gaza and the nearly 2,000 who have been killed ... and the rebirth of Russian Nationalism.

A visitor had already reported being more or less ostracized at work for her sympathies for the non-combatant Palestinian deaths. A head of the Political Arm of Hamas had already disinterred the blood libel, accusing all Jews of baking their Passover Matzahs with the blood of non-Jewish children ... I suppose, accusing them of transgressing the rules of being Kosher, at the same time. A colleague online had shot off the classic anti-Semitic shot across the bow: Jews are the chosen people and therefore subject to different rules, a benign comment that historically has presaged the terrorizing or killing or ostracizing of Jews. Another colleague thought it a good joke.

The world was abuzz with discussions and arguments about who was at fault in that little piece of land that seems to foment so much argumentation ... I refer to Israel and Gaza and the West Bank ... a strip of land that represents barely a Piss in the Ocean amongst the great nations of the Middle East ... 1-2% of the land-mass ... 2% of the population. The World, as I said, was abuzz with this when I sat down for dinner with M, my closest friends, and their eldest grand-daughter. Right or wrong, I had expressed my belief that in spite of the devastation and killing of nearly 2,000 Palestinians and the bombing of schools and at least one hospital that the Israeli response was restrained by Middle Eastern standards. After all, the Syrians had managed to destroy cities and kill 150,000 while displacing millions. Hossein had gassed the Kurds. The Iran-Iraq War claimed over 1,000,000 -- many children, in the count. ISIS was on the rampage and Mosul had just been emptied of Christians ... denizens of Nineveh/Mosul since forever.

The young woman began interpreting my comments as approval of the results ... I was a baby-killer and a hospital-bomber. She screamed. She hollered. Her grandmother screamed at her. Her grandfather quietly disagreed with me ... well, maybe not so quietly but respectfully. After all, we have been friends since 1968 and, in that time, he had ample opportunity to consider whether I was in favor of killing babies. And he was 73.

I make a point of saying that he was 73. There are advantages that accrue to living in the Last Quarter of life. I could certainly understand a 24 year old's fervor and even admire it. Still, the years make it more likely that we develop what I call "The Presumption of Good Intentions" ... the propensity for allowing the possibility that the Other -- the one who disagrees with me -- is coming from a position in which s/he has  maybe-not-perfectly-thought-out but still not thoroughly unreasoned systems of thinking.

Ah. The 24 year old will grow to consider that Great Uncle Howard might not have been a perfidious advocate of infanticide ... whether those children are from his ethnic group or another. Howard will have gone to his reward, sadly, by then.

Cry for Howard!