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Thursday, October 20, 2011

Kvetch II addendum ... A Birthday Card from some time ago

A note is in order. I've been writing doggerel about
an aging psychoanalyst named Abe Isaacs ... I began in
1994 when I began to feel more or less than my oats:

Being that No One Writes Verse
for Abe Isaacs Anymore
(from Ditties et Lettres d’Abe Isaacs:
Doggerel from one some say has spent
too many years behind the couch and two
few upon it  – some years ago)

“A mere piss in the ocean, sixty three years,”
Said Abe, as he trailed down birthday stairs,
To serve birthday kibble to waiting dog and cat,
To fetch birthday coffee, alas! No more birthday cigarette.
“A day for all to revel with middle-aged me,
How much more pleased could any man be?”

“A cosmic fleck on the Milky Way”
Aside, said he, quotidian fears to stay.
Then appeared in his throat the telltale knot
When noticing the cat’s favorite spot
To shit upon when puss is feeling bitter
That no one had bothered to change her litter.
And while feeding the dog, the wish to run
Realizing that decisions are never made as one
But rather by the rule: my will be done.

“Didn’t we agree on a uniform ban
on inuring the cats to eat meat from a can!?”
Abe found a solution, a tad-bit rash
Abe pulled out his sprinkler and make his own splash.
“I piss on the world! Why the hell not?
Who gives the pussy dominion on that spot?
A day for all to revel with middle-aged me
Please ... save your sighs .... no sympathy.”

“For I’m no zit on the Lord’s six day creation
Having arrived after all other failed experimentation.
Now, three score plus three, know what I ought’a do”
Abe barks at the rising Sun, “Hey Sun, Hey you!
Three fourth down, a fourth remains
Of vigor and charm and hearty refrains
Let all who’ve tasted their own felicity
Come and revel ... Mine lives, too!
Inside this protesting but vigorous,
Middle-aged me!”

The moral of Abe’s story is ...
Many will scoff when you’re pissed off
And judge you, indeed, if you run off
But if you seek pets or missus to be cooperatively compliant
rather than covertly and silently defiant
then the rule is:
He who pisses never misses.

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